Saturday, March 03, 2007

The perfect crime

To commit the perfect murder:

1. Find a stranger - the police investigation always starts with acquaintences of the victim.

2. Lure the stranger to the desert.

3. Stab the victim with large icicle. Has to be large, about 2 feet long, 1 inch circumference, because icicles don't lend themselves to repeated stabbings. This will leave a hole big enough to get the job done.

4. Leave the crime scene - very important.

The icicle will melt in the desert sun, disposing of the murder weapon and your fingerprints. Since the human body is mostly water, the little bit that makes up the icicle (or as I call it, the perfect engine of destruction) won't significantly add to the total amount. Sometimes simplicity equals perfection.

Caution: do not use in northern latitudes; also, be careful harvesting icicle, those things can put your eye out.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dude, I thought I had cabin fever!

10:35 PM  
Blogger t-bone said...

Yeah, we got alot of snow...

2:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

People should read this.

8:22 PM  

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